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Paula Rule

Embracing The Power Of Choice

Updated: Aug 25, 2023

There are lots of things we can’t control in this world. Other people’s opinion of us, their actions, thoughts and beliefs, the past and the future, to name just some. Unfortunately, lots of us spend valuable mental and emotional energy focusing on things that we simply have no control over. What we need to spend that time focusing on, is the fact we are the authors of our stories. Every day, we're faced with countless choices that collectively craft our story. The beauty lies in the fact that we have the autonomy to choose how we respond to situations. We can either let negativity cast its shadow or light up our lives with positivity. It's not about denying the existence of negativity but about embracing our ability to choose how much power we allow it to have over us.

Here's a few things to think about when considering the power of choice:


Being the Bouncers of Our Brain

Picture your mind as a nightclub (remember those times pre kids when we were wild and free?! – who am I kidding, I was never that wild, but I definitely felt free) and your thoughts are the partygoers. Some are fun, positive, and uplifting, while others are negative, self-doubting, and sometimes toxic. Just as a club has bouncers to control who enters, we need to be the bouncers of our brain. We have the right to decide which thoughts get past the velvet rope and which ones are turned away. This is where the real magic of choice happens – by curating our mental guest list and inviting only those thoughts that serve our growth and well-being.


Understanding the Role of the Reticular Activating System (R.A.S)

Ever heard of the Reticular Activating System (R.A.S)? Think of it as your brain's personal assistant, diligently filtering the millions of stimuli around you to decide what deserves your attention. The clearest example of my R.A.S in action was when we first decided that we wanted to start a family. From then on, all I seemed to see was pregnant women – everywhere! My R.A.S had highlighted that pregnancy was important, so it made sure I saw it and focused on it. The flip side is if we choose to fixate on negativity, the R.A.S will find ample evidence to support our view. However, by consciously choosing to focus on the positive aspects of life, we can retrain our brain to seek out the good. It's all about setting our internal compass in the direction of positivity.


The Art of Reframing

Imagine you're gazing at a picturesque landscape through a window with a dirty pane. The view might be breathtaking, but the smudges on the glass distort your perception. Reframing is like cleaning that window. It's the art of shifting our perspective to see situations in a more positive and empowering light. When negativity rears its head, take a step back and ask yourself, "How can I look at this differently?" By consciously choosing to reframe, we're actively opting for a more positive and productive perspective.



Navigating Negative People

Ah, negative people – they seem to have a knack for showing up when we least expect them. Remember, we can't control the behaviour of others, but we can control our response. These individuals might bring dark clouds, but we can choose not to let them rain on our parade. Surround yourself with uplifting, supportive people who lift you up, and remember that their negativity is a reflection of their own inner struggles. Be the lighthouse that stands tall amidst the storm, guiding your ship toward calmer waters.


So, as we journey through life, let's embrace the fact that we hold the key to our own happiness and growth. We can choose to focus on the positive aspects of life, even when negativity knocks on our door. By understanding the role of the Reticular Activating System, we can guide our attention toward the beauty and opportunities that surround us. And let's not forget the transformative power of reframing – a tool that can turn challenges into steppingstones, obstacles into opportunities.


Let's be mindful of the power we hold within. Let's be the bouncers of our brain, inviting only the thoughts that empower us. Let's dance in the rain of positivity and productivity, even when negativity tries to dampen our spirits. Remember, life isn't just about the cards we're dealt; it's about how we choose to play them. Choose wisely and watch as your world transforms into a masterpiece of your own making. You've got this.





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